Tech tips for parents
Also on this page: Private smartphones, Learn together, Social media alternatives, Roblox safety guide, Other parent guides
Smartphones
Basic rules
- Do not give them a smartphone at least until they go to high school
- Do not let them take the smartphone into their bedroom. Ever.
- "No tech at the table"
- Educate you child about how Big Tech products work. Keep telling them and they'll get the message (and roll their eyes a lot). We've linked to a great book and documentary below.
- Restrict the time they have on the phone, and control which apps can be installed - using parental controls apps.
Parental controls apps
On phones
These are available from Google (Google Family) for Android phones, and from Apple on iPhones (Apple Screen Time, once you've set up Family Sharing).
The Google Family app is quite good, but the time controls are not that granular. We've heard the Apple controls are fairly easy for children to bypass. So here are some tips for making that more difficult:
- Use a Screen Time passcode that is different from the device unlock code, and never share it
- Go to Settings > Screen Time > Content & Privacy Restrictions and set:
- Account Changes → Don't Allow
- Passcode Changes → Don't Allow
- Location Services > System Services > Setting Time Zone → Don't Allow Changes
- Turn on "Block at End of Limit" instead of just warning
On laptops and iPads
On Windows you can use the Family Safety feature. There are phone apps where you can approve and change screen time. Clunky, but works well enough for daily limits on laptops.
On Apple laptops and iPads the same Apple Screen Time feaures apply.
Alternative parental control and screen time mobile apps
Try these instead of Google or Apple's apps:
| App name | Platforms | Features | Open Source? | Country of Origin |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Be Present | Both | Gamifies reducing screen time | No | USA |
| ScreenZen | Both | Helps you reduce screen time with self imposed, hard to bypass, limits. Good for teenagers. | No | USA |
| KidSafe | Android only | Manages screen time, app blocking and location; Great privacy | Yes | Open Source |
| Child Screen Time (CST) | Android only | Very technical setup - not easy; Simple screen time management and app limits | Yes | Open Source |
Privacy smartphones
With your child's first phone it's probably a hand-me-down, or a cheap new one. We recommend flashing a privacy OS onto it if it's the former (and on the 'easy list' on our Mobile OS page) or buying a privacy phone from Iode, Murena, or GrapheneOS. Start them off the right way, without the tracking and profiling of Big Tech!
Learn together
The Amazing Generation
Book by Jonathan Haidt & Catherine Price. My 13 year old loved this book - it really explains, with illustrations, how Big Tech are hacking their brains
Molly vs The Machines
Documentary by Marc Silver. This hard-hitting documentary is a must see for any child who is asking to be able to use social media
Social media alternatives
Governments are so far failing to force Big Tech to fix their defective products, so your best bet is to avoid their products entirely. Your child will hate you in the short term but thank you later. But if they are at the age when they really feel they need to be using social media, these alternatives are not billionaire-owned, algorithm-driven, data-harvesting or ad-infested:
| App name | Alternative to | Protocol (if decentralised) | Best Features | Country of Origin | Link |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| YouTube | n/a | Access YouTube content with a similar look and feel to the Youtube app, but without the tracking, profiling and addictive features; Desktop only | Open Source | FreeTubeApp.io | |
Kinzoo |
SnapChat | n/a | Snapchat-like video filters; Parents approve each contact | USA | Kinzoo.com |
JusTalk Kids |
SnapChat | n/a | Snapchat-like video filters and games; Only approved contacts; E2EE | UK | Kids.Justalk.com |
| ActivityPub | Ad free, privacy friendly, chronological feeds; Stories, Albums, Filters; Federates with Mastodon | Canada | Pixelfed.org | ||
| TikTok and Instagram | AT Proto | Federates with Bluesky; Tiktok alternative; Control your feed; As with Bluesky they have taken VC funds so buyer beware | USA | Skylight.social | |
Loops |
TikTok | ActivityPub | Federates with Mastodon and Pixelfed; Chronological feed; No data harvesting or ads; Same developer as Pixelfed | Canada | JoinLoops.org |
| Instagram and X | n/a (app lock-in) | Founded by a Palastinian citizen; Promises no censorship or shadow-banning; Not decentralised so is a platform lock-in | Australia | Upscrolled.com | |
| X and Facebook | ActivityPub | Real conversations with friendly people; no algorithm; chronological timeline; follow hashtags; federated with other fediverse apps | Germany | JoinMastodon.org | |
| n/a | WhatsApp is turning into a social media app, with AI chatbots and 'Communities'; Keep children just talking to their real friends using Signal; Fully E2EE | USA | Signal.org |
Roblox tips
In general avoid Roblox if you can. It is deliberately addictive and has no default controls to prevent your child interacting with adults.
Instructions for how set up Roblox controls for better safety are here .
Other parent tech guides
- Smartphone Free Childhood .org
- Society of Behavioural Medicine .org
- Family Education .com
- Parent.tech
Next➡️ Educate yourself with more books, films & blogs in our Resources section
Kinzoo
JusTalk Kids
Loops